October Update

Maybe I should change the title of this blog to "Diary of a failing businessman".

Anyway.

I told the Admin girl that I was letting her go. I felt so bad, but what could I do? I also told one director and will be speaking with the other to make him redundant also. I am also considering replacing our sales person as I feel that he is just sitting on his ass and living off his basic salary until things get better. I am actively looking for approximately 2 new sales people. Cash flow is so tight that it's just week to week now and I'm really hoping that another deal comes across the line to relieve the pressure. The deal I was most hopeful for went south last week as I was let down at the last minute by the people that were funding me, hence another guy got the prize. C'est la vie.

When the alarm goes in the morning and I wake up, more and more I feel like I am in a prison, albeit of my own making. A guy who was a good friend is now sending me solicitors letters about a joint investment which I can no longer afford to fund.

Every time the slightest thing goes wrong, my wife just loses it and "throw's her toys out of the pram". Her behaviour is just adding to my stress levels. My eyes feel like I've been crying all of the time, even though I haven't. I'm sure that there are others in far worse situations than I but that is no consolation. Misery never looks for company, only for sympathy and solutions.

I am worried that as the days go by that I am becoming less and less capable/able to work my way through this, to come up with innovative, new ways of making revenue. I am concerned that I am becoming depressed.

I need something to go my way...............soon.